I GET MONEY!
Just finished up day 3 on my new slave ship, which so far is far, far fucking sweeter than any of my previous slave ships. In addition to not completely sucking, I remembered a few things about having a real job that are pretty awesome:
1) Making Money: Whoever says money doesn’t matter is lying. Making money is one of the best feelings ever. EVER. And after my last hiatus, I realized the thing with a real job is that you have to trade at least 40-60 hours of your life every week in order to have the freedom to do whatever the fuck you want with those other hours.
2) Secretaries: I find it completely hilarious that someone somewhere has determined that not only do I need, but I am fully qualified to supervise, another human being that does all of my bitch work. Just the concept of having a secretary again is awesome. I just wish mine didn’t talk so much.
3) Health Insurance: I’m gonna go get so many goddam eye exam, teeth cleanings, testicular cancer checks, you motherfuckers don’t even know. It’s also good to kow that a freak trip to the emergency room won’t make me an indentured servant fo the rest of my life. Fuck Barack Obama, I’ll take my health care the old fashioned way … expensive and employer subsidized.
